jinn0uchi: dendropsyche: OKAY so i just saw the most ridiculous thing at the store today so we come across this thing and we discover you can turn it inside out and ITS HELLO KITTY I’M HSE’S EVEN GOT HER OWN LITTLE CHICKEN DRUMSTICK IM SO DONE why the fuck
leftforbed: leftforbed: mcsnuggie: true self control is waiting until the movie starts to eat your popcorn why would the movie eat my popcorn nevermind i get it
sweeneytad: *dentist slaughters family in front of you* they’re bleeding because you don’t floss
stylishirish: my sister showed me this and ive been laughing for like 20 minutes
jonxdaenerys: hellhound-of-the-baskervilles: jonxdaenerys: If you’re ever feeling sad just remember that: 1. You are not the author or 50 Shades of Grey 2. You will never hate life as much as Robert Pattinson 3. You will never lose as many friends as the Doctor was that last one really necessary
calciumwaves: IT’S ALMOST MIDNIGHT AND THERE WAS A KNOCK AT MY DOOR SO I CAUTIOUSLY OPENED THE DOOR THEN TWO DRUNKEN GUYS SHOUTED “SURPRISE” THEN LOOKED AT ME FOR A MOMENT AND WENT “FUCK WE’RE AT THE WRONG HOUSE” AND RAN AWAY DOWN THE STREET OH MY GOD
url-goes-here: have you ever been reading something and completely understood a line of foreshadowing and just whispered “shit”
keep-calm-stay-healthy: recovery-ghost: Sometimes you make an argument that’s so solid and logical that you’re absolutely certain you got your point across, then someone replies to it with something so mindblowingly stupid that you have no idea how they managed to graduate from middle school.
pyac: awesomephilia: quazza: i am reminded that english is a flawed language every time I am forced to use “that that” in a sentence That that is is. That that is not is not. Is that it? It is. FUCK
starrynights-: shouldertappingghosts: If I was a famous author I would publish a book with ten different endings which all went to print with varying degrees of rarity, but not tell the fans about it so that I could watch their confusion as they disagree over how the story ended. Then when they figured it out I would ‘come clean’, telling them that I had released eleven alternate endings and...
benedictbooty: i-o-u-an-assbutt: iamaproudsuperwholockian: counting-to-one-hundred: APPARENTLY ACCORDING TO CBC NEWS TUMBLR IS KNOWN FOR “Foul language and nude photos” REALLY? THATS ALL? WHY NOT THE AMAZING ARTISTS? THE SOCIAL JUSTICE? EVEN THE PHOTOGRAPHS ON THE SO CALLED “HIPSTER BLOGS” WE ARE MORE THAN JUST FOUL LANGUAGE AND NUDE PHOTOS. WE ARE SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT Are we? ...
lolsofunny: So Zac Efron won People’s Choice Awards for ”Favourite Dramatic movie actor” and all I can think about is
mrschriskendall: mrschriskendall: ”where do you wanna go to dinner?” ”i don’t care” ”ok” why this got notes i’ll never know
the-fandoms-are-cool: darrynek: hey kid wanna see a magic trick *reaches behind your ear* ready? *rips your ear off* where’d it go I’m so mad you didn’t say “where’d it van gogh?”
voodooish: shadowgentleman: Being part of a fandom but not really caring about the show anymore Being into a show where it’s fandom has already died off.
ifyoucarryonthisway: i need a job where i work one hour a week and i get paid a thousand dollars a minute
princeowl: when kids complain about school or joke about dropping out im pretty sure theyre not saying that they dont want an education theyre saying that the school system is flawed and horrible and makes them feel shitty about themselves and doesnt provide a good environment for learning
peetamellarcs: if someone ever cheats on me im going to invite them for a romantic candle lit dinner in a deserted area and then im going to tell them stories about how i killed my ex boyfriend in the woods because he cheated on me and then im going to point to the trees and say “actually those woods right over there” and then im going to blow out the candle and laugh
bloodyoathmate: Plot Twist: Tumblr buys Yahoo and deletes it
How to meet celebrities: Write a book that's good enough to become a movie.
willsmith420: gwenelizz: Someone please explain to me why Will Smith looks exactly the same as he did in 1989
lookslikeazipper: Right so im walking home and I see this guy rolling a cigarette under a streetlamp and when he clicked his lighter THE FUCKING STREETLIGHT WENT OUT I stopped in my tracks and stared at this guy who looks up at me then to his lighter and hes as surprised as me then he takes his thumb off the trigger and THE STREETLIGHT TURNS BACK ON HE GAVE THE MOST SURPRISED LOOK OF ANYONE...
ALRIGHT YOU LITTLE SHITS
abandoned-us: dreamwurks: hacheload: rosenkristall: TUMBLR AND IT’S FUTURE IS AT STAKE HERE SIGN AND REBLOG IF YOU WANT TO SAVE TUMBLR FROM YAHOO SIGNAL BOOST HOLY FUCKING SHIT, I CHECKED AND THIS IS NOT A DRILL I REPEAT, THIS IS NOT A DRILL. We need 5,000,000 signatures i know there’s enough bloggers out there hell sign twice using different emails. I signed three times with...
Yahoo bought Tumblr pass it on
sexydavestrider: french-miaou: nicodidevilo: mrsmosby-wannabe: relright: thecouscousqueen: kenyabenyagurl: thinksquad: Announcement coming Monday WHAT DOES THIS MEAN I smell ads coming if this is true I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO EXPECT I AM SEEING FUCKING ADS I AM SEEING FUCKING ADS ABANDON FUCKING SHIP ABANDON FUCKING SHIP thank you french-miaou for offering hope.
everyonesahero: does anybody else just like research things for fun like you’re curious about something so you go read the whole wikipedia article on it and then read all the stuff the wikipedia article references and go to the library and read some books on it until you have all this new knowledge about a subject that actually has no real bearing on your life you were just kind of interested...